THE BASKET THAT FILLED ITSELF: BELIEVING IN THE POWER OF GRATITUDE

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There is a golden thread that runs through all the teachings and makes them work for those who sincerely accept and apply them, and that thread can be named in a single word: belief. It is the same element or factor, belief, which causes people to be cured through mental healing, enables others to climb high the ladder of success, and gets phenomenal results for all who accept it." — Claude M. Bristol

Whatever you want to accomplish in life, naming where you are is an easy first step. But admiring something from a distance and trusting it to carry you where you want to go takes more effort.

When my daughter Mia had the stroke, I was already living the benefits of a Gratitude practice, but I needed her to believe the journey was worth taking again. I had introduced her to Gratitude journaling before she left for college. She liked it, but like so many of us, she let the demands of college force her to drop it. I knew that if it was going to work this time, I had to do more demonstrating and less talking.

So on Valentine's Day 2017, her thirty-sixth day in the hospital, before she had relearned to read or write, I decided to put Gratitude to the test.

I bought miniature boxes of chocolates, placed them in a basket, and asked Mia to give one to each "special" member of the hospital and rehab staff, an idea she loved. She handed them out to first and second shifts and was amazed at how good it felt to watch faces light up when she placed a box of chocolates in their hands. "It was just a little box of candy," she told me (I'm paraphrasing), "but they reacted like it was something big." I reminded her that giving from the heart always feels good, and the gift's size didn't matter.

Everything she gave came right back around, and more. Her night nurse brought her something. Family members dropped off treats. A cousin in another state, someone she barely knew, sent a handmade Valentine card with cash tucked inside. An uncle surprised her with a Valentine blanket and a heart-shaped pillow, which she proudly showed to everyone who walked into her room. By the end of the day, the basket she'd emptied was overflowing.

Research supports what happened that day with Mia. Robert A. Emmons, a leading positive psychology scholar, describes Gratitude in two stages in Thanks! How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier (Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 2007, p. 4): "First, gratitude is the acknowledgment of goodness in one's life. Second, gratitude is recognizing that the source(s) of this goodness lie at least partially outside the self."

The next morning, Mia looked at the basket on her bedside table and thanked me again for the idea. She still couldn't believe how good it felt. But I understood - it was one of the gifts of Gratitude: the gift of generosity. Without a word from me, she had witnessed her first Gratitude "blesson" - that giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin.

I knew then that she was ready to continue her journey. My next task was to use Gratitude's gifts to help her relearn to read and write. And, one small change at a time, she made her first Gratitude list on April 9, 2017. That simple list has morphed into introspective journaling, and almost 10 years later, she's soaring on the wings of Gratitude to places she never imagined.

Here's this week's small-change takeaway: Believing in the power of Gratitude keeps it from becoming a meaningless ritual you drop the minute you feel overwhelmed. The three prompts below are my invitation to test it for yourself: to believe in something that changes how you think about health and what it means to "Be Well," regardless of the circumstances.

THREE JOURNALING PROMPTS

1.     Give it a test run. Do one small, unexpected act of kindness today, such as a note, a treat, or a sincere thank-you. Afterward, write down how it felt to give and what, if anything, came back to you.

2.     Name the source. Write about one good thing in your life right now. Then follow Emmons's second stage: who or what outside yourself helped bring it about? Say “Thank You” to them on the page.

3.     Start small on purpose. Mia’s first Gratitude list was just a list. Write three simple things you’re grateful for right now, no explanations needed. Then add four tomorrow, five on Tuesday, and keep it going. As your list grows, so do your “blessons” (blessings and lessons).

Be Grateful: Be Well!

Need help getting started on your Gratitude journey? Contact me at: smallchange@myrtlerussell.com

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